Truth.

An incredible woman passed away today. I've read so many amazing quotes from her today and I have loved it. I thought about putting all of them up, but then just maybe they might not feel as significant as they really are. Too much of a good thing? I hear it happens. Instead I settled on one that resonates deep within me. For better or for worse, this my friends, is pure and simple truth. 

Okay I can't resist, here's a link to 17 other fantastic quotes from this legend.

Flashing Back 13 Years

May of 2001 was a beast! Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that I was a beast as well.  I had been harboring a little human in the mid section of my body for 9 months and was totally over the experience. I had pretty much out grown all maternity clothes.  By the 22nd there had already been 5 days over 100*.  When you are the size of a whale, this matters.  I knew I would never be spending much time swimming in my super sized state, but bought a swim suit nevertheless.  It was a frightening sight really, but it was the only thing that I could wear and maintain a bearable body temperature and that didn't cut off my circulation.  The problem was there was no way I was letting anyone see me in this get up.  It was a purple tent/maternity suit and I looked like Barney only I didn't even feel like being friends with anyone.  When I was 6 months along people would say to me, "I bet you're due any day now!"  Oh they were so wrong.  By the time I actually got close the the 9 month mark people stopped really saying anything. Mostly I just got these sad looks accompanied by a shake of the head.  On more than one occasion I just got a sympathetic hand on the shoulder and with puppy dog eyes people would say,"I'm sorry".  Yes I looked that uncomfortable.  So you can only imagine how scary I was in that Barney swim suit.  Once I was in the hallway when I heard a friend knock as she entered my front door I bolted for my bedroom as fast a large swollen footed moose of a pregnant lady can bolt and hid in my closet and yelled out, "hang on I'm not dressed, let me get some clothes on"  Im sure she was freaked out at the possibility of me wandering the house naked in my state and she kindly herded her kids back to the entry and waited while I found a robe to I could at least leave the closet and not give the children nightmares.

By the 20th of May I had had it.  I was about to have an emotional and mental breakdown. My torso is just not long enough to accommodate little humans for very long without constantly having to jam little feet out of my ribcage.  The truth was I was getting downright claustrophobic!  I had worked myself into a panic and called the advice nurse at Kaiser. "Please," I begged her, "Please just tell me ANYTHING I can do to get this baby out of me! We cannot share my body for one more day! There just isn't enough room for the both of us!"  That sweet nurse must have been there before. She calmly gave me a list of every medically backed up bit of information of things I could do that might get things going.  Then she told me all the old wives tales like eating spicy foods etc. And then as if I could hear her winking she gave me a list of all the things I "probably shouldn't" do incase they caused me to go into labor.  I'll be darned if I didn't try EVERY single thing she said. Who knows if any of it really helped but within 48 hours I finally went into labor.  It was speedy quick and my mom didn't even make it to the hospital in time and we only live about 3 miles from the hospital!

 The miserable month of May and every uncomfortable moment of the previous 9 months were totally worth it though.  My little Drew was finally born and he instantly had my heart.

He has always been a snuggler and would caress my neck or my cheek whenever I would feed him or he was falling asleep. He still to this day is a love just like that.  I get no less than 10 hugs a day from that sweet boy and he is always looking out for me. He wants to know if I had a good day and if I had time to do anything just for me. He will often come in and just rub my shoulders or my feet. He never lets a day go by without saying I love you at least once.  He is ALWAYS grateful for EVERY little thing I do for him and expresses it. He's always had the sweetest little manners and has always said please and thank you and excuse me.

As hes gotten older he had become funnier and funnier. He is so quick witted and truly always has me cracking up laughing.  I don't know where he comes up with the things he says but he is creative and can do the best impressions of others and can do just about any accent.  His comedic timing is fantastic too!  The kid just really kills me.

Another fun thing about my little man is that he can sing like nobody's business! I love listening to him. He's following in Wes' footsteps and getting really good at the piano too.  Next week at his piano recital he's going to play and sing for the first time ever.  I 've been listening to him practice and it is really going to be a treat!

I love Drew's sweet testimony and that he has always been so willing and ready to share it.  One of my favorite stories about Drew was when he was really young and it was maybe his second time sharing his testimony in sacrament meeting.  He got up there and just kinda froze and grinned out at the audience.  Finally he said, " sorry, this is only like my second time doing this and I'm having like really big stage fright..."  He just melted me!  Drew is always quick to pray to get answers to questions or help with different situations, and he knows he will be answered.

Today he turned 13, giving me three teenagers in the house.  It's a fun milestone for him but I just know the next 5 years with him at home are going to fly by.  I want to relish those years and remember all the little details.  I am so grateful to be this sweet boys mom.  As Drew and I drove around together tonight helping a friend with an Eagle project and we found ourselves in the middle of a huge storm my mind was brought back to that sweltering May 13 years ago. I really don't miss being pregnant and feel nothing short of bliss knowing I will never have to do that again.  However I'd do all of those miserable 9 months and all 5 of those beastly 100+ days over again in a heartbeat just to get my Drew.  Happiest of Birthday's little man, I love you!

*Probably it would have been nice to add pictures from the time period  was telling the story from however seeing as I was as big as a house and feeling oh so lovely, I'm fairly certain are zero pictures of this time period, and I for one am quite alright with this. You should be grateful too. Instead, this is what Drew's 13th birthday looked like, and he says it was for sure one of his very best.

PDA5K

I loved being a part of this community wide drive to bring awareness to the growing prescription drug awareness campaign.

Our community leaders were gracious and so fun to work with.

The sunday night kickoff meeting was heart wrenching and eye opening

The turn out we got for passing out flyers letting people know about our event was huge!

We actually ran out of flyers the first night and dipped into the stash for the second nights gathering

The youth showed up in huge numbers and were great workers 

They were smiling and happy to be out in the community

They showed up with their families and got to work

Other organizations jumped in and joined the efforts

A press conference was held on Friday 

We discussed all the last minute preparations

I got lots of fun help at the packet pick up booth Friday night

Saturday morning it was game on!

Our committee was there wearing capes and smiles and ready to work!

I ended up a bit short for volunteers along the race course because so many people wanted to run.  This cute guy happily stepped up last minute and prepped the finishers refreshment table and stayed through til the end!

My beautiful friend Heidi started the morning for us by singing the National Anthem

Because of the lack of volunteers I wasn't able to run, the plus side to this was that I was able to get some really fun pictures of the race as it was happening 

The area of the race that I manned just so happened to be towards the end of the race and the lighting was great for catching the smiles on our runners faces.

We had a kids fun run that I missed completely as I was out at the finish line where our last two disabled runners had just come through.

Two of my good friends had cute boys who ran the 5k and were among some of the first to cross the finish line.  Cute and speedy little dudes!

After the races we visited and checked out the carnival booths complete with a petting zoo, bounce houses, face painting and a dunk tank

The winners of the various divisions won super hero capes

And then there was the prescription drug drop boxes that were filled.  The turn out was awesome!

Almost 700 runners in the 5k. Money was made to help fund the drop boxes, and lots and lots of prescription drugs were brought in to be properly disposed of.  It was a great success and an absolute privilege to be a part of!

A Little Sensitivity, Or Maybe a Lot

I hate it when I am reminded just how sensitive I really am. For the most part I think I'm pretty sensitive to people around me.  I notice moods, expressions, reactions, body language. I truly feel excitement for my friends accomplishments and and sorrow for their struggles. I'm grateful that I can usually see these things so plainly. It helps me not to be offended when someone says things that could be hurtful or sometimes down right rude because I think I understand why they're lashing out and can just respond to that instead of what they said. I think it helps me to be more compassionate and love people in a broad sense. But this sensitivity also means I can really get my feelings hurt too.  I know not everyone is going to like me. I know my personality is big and loud. I know I can be a bit much for some people, but knowing this never softens the blow of realizing its happened again.  My reaction is always retreat. I want to crawl into a hole and hide or at least avoid anyone who might not want to be around me, putting both of us out of our misery.  I wish it didn't matter to me, that it didn't hurt my feelings. I know it shouldn't. I could give you a long list of all my annoying little quirks. Today I'm going to try to go against my natural inclination of retreat but instead, keep a smile on my face and love the people who do want me around a little better.  I love being able to be sensitive to others, I just wish I wasn't so sensitive myself!