I'm all kinds of nuts!
The worst part is, I know it! And not just because so many of you have told me how nuts I am for all the running I do, but because I can just tell. I'm not myself, I'm out of sorts with what is normal for me.
I have a tendency not worry about much of anything. Whatever comes my way I can handle it, or figure out how to fix it and if not I am sure I have a friend who can. (My friends are a rather amazing and talented bunch!) But right now, I cant figure anything! I even picked up one of my books on marathons and sat up on the steps of my bathtub and read it from start to finish all 200 hundred pages in one sitting, at midnight a few nights ago.
Luckily I found something that makes me feel a little justified in my crazy state. There is a well documented condition in the running world called "Taper Madness". Lots of runners get this in the weeks prior to a marathon as we are supposed to cut back on our miles and let our muscles start to heal a bit before we torture them with the marathon. Its the lack of running that makes us nuts!
I'm not kidding! On page 189 top of the page it says:
The symptoms of Taper Madness are well documented. They include but are not limited to:
1. An unnatural need to spend money
2. An attraction to buying hideous running apparel
3. A "must have" mentality toward running toys
4. A complete aversion to running
So lets start at the top, while I didn't spend tons of money, I did spend almost 4 hours wandering at the mall on Saturday, looking for things I just couldn't live without. I haven't done that since I was a teenager!
Hideous running apparel. Now I'm wondering about the skirt, am I crazy? Does it really look as hideous as I had always thought them to be? I have actually gone out and purchased a ton of running clothes in the last week too...hmmm
Next up running toys, well not so much but I am obsessing about what to wear around my waist to carry all my junk while I run. Not gonna do the water belt. Fanny pack water bottle combo, not really necessary to lug any water with me because of all the water stations, maybe I should just go find one that is just a pack with a bigger pocket... hmmm not sure still. I also really want to get a different knee support to wear. But then it may be dumb to change that right before because I don't know how it will work, but I do know the one I'm wearing now bugs me. Again undecided!
Running lately has left me wondering why I feel like I'm moving in slow motion like in my dreams where my body never works the way it is supposed to, but my watch says I'm running at my normal pace. I just feel slow and like I'm dragging and I don't know that I have trained enough or run as many miles as I should have.
Other random things Im starving all the time but nothing sounds good. Well nothing but chocolate as though that's going to satisfy my hunger. Its the comfort food. Oh and here's another random one, I keep having the strongest urge to just drop and do push ups! I think because I feel so unprepared, but I know Im supposed to give my legs a break, maybe I'm just trying to make up for it in my arms. Whatever, it can't hurt right?
Last week a friend told me about needing warm clothes to wear as we are all waiting to start the race and all 7000 people are bussed to the starting line. Hello! I knew nothing about this, what else do i not know about??? this started me wondering about all sorts of things like does it really matter if I wear toenail polish or not, what should I be eating this week, how many miles can I really get away with running, where am I staying again, visor or hat or nothing on my head, what really needs to go in my fanny pack? iphone or ipod? is there really enough battery in my phone to play my music for 4 hours? what music should be in my playlist?
SEE WHAT I MEAN? I'M NUTS!!!
So much to do, so much to decide, and really in my head I know it will all be just fine. I can't change any of it now. Now its just time to relax and then go out and do whatever I can. So why can't I shake this manic feeling?!